Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Back On Track

I've fallen apart.  I'm not afraid to admit it.  I have lost all sense of organiztion and control of my daily life.

Since October, I have gained 25 pounds, leaving me 7 pounds shy of my full term pregnancy weight with The Boy.  My self image is shot, my motivation is down, and my energy level non-existant. 

In addition, I feel like my home is falling apart around me.  Any semblance of the routine I once had is completely gone.  After taking my kids to school, I crawl back into bed and often times don't get back out until I have to go pick them up.  That means household chores aren't getting done, laundry is piling up, and very little is getting cleaned.

This all needs to change.  I am very unhappy in my body and in my home.  I know I am the only one that can do anything about it.  So I am going to get of my fat, lazy ass and make some changes.

It sounds like a lot to tackle. Which is why I am bringing it to this forum.  The sense of community I feel in the blogosphere is far greater than any network I have IRL.  I know there are men and women that read my blog and probably yours that are feeling defeated as well.  I also know there are people that read our blogs that have overcome these feelings of defeat.  I am reaching out to all of you for support and inspiration.  I have also read in many places that publicly stating your goals helps in making them more attainable.

So here it is!  I need to get my life back on track!  I need to take control of my physical health and lose 35 pounds.  I plan to do this through healthy diet and exercise.  My goal is to work out twice a week with a trainer for 1/2 hour sessions.  In additon to the training, I plan to get in a half an hour of cardio 5 days a week and strength training or workout videos on non-training days.  In January, I created a Spark People account.  I will be using this account to track my food intake as well as utilizing the site for recipes.

To get control of my home, I am going to be going back to the Fly Lady.  Once upon a time her Beginner Baby Steps set me on a path to getting my house together.  It has worked for me in the past and I believe that it can work for me again.  My life is lacking routine.  This program will help me to create a new one. 

I'm going to be tracking my journey for the next 31 days.  Why 31 days?  Well, I've been told that it takes 28 days to develop a new habit.  The Flylady breaks down her baby steps into 31 days - to help develop new habits and routines.  31 days will also give me 4 weeks to get back into a workout and healthy eating habit and hopefully begin to see changes.  I will be tracking my progress and discussing my journey in my Blog Frog Community.  I will share before and after pictures, success stories and tales of things that didn't work so hot for me.  Ultimately, my goal is to find my better me, the one I lost somewhere along the way. 

Flylady image belongs to


BigSis said...

I know EXACTLY how you feel! I now weigh MORE than I did at full term pregnancy and have very similar issues with the rest of my life falling apart.

Sounds like you are doing the right thing and pulling yourself out of the funk. Good for you! I also am a fan of the Fly Lady.

The only piece of advice I would add is to consider seeing a doctor. There's a possibility that some anti-depressants, even on a short term basis, will help you get motivated to achieve your goals. I couldn't survive without them!

Big hugs to you. Feel free to email ANY time you need motivation.

Candice said...

I've been there before with the staying in bed all day thing. Every little minute thing seemed as though it took a monumental effort to accomplish.

I defintely think you have great goals and are on the right track.

I always hate to suggest this because people usually take it the wrong way, but I've always maintained that therapy can do wonders. (I think EVERYONE could benefit from therapy ;)I'm not saying go to a therapist so that they can numb you out on medication. I just know that talking about things can definitely be freeing and eye opening.

Hope you are out from under that cloud soon.

Anonymous said...

Hey, it happens to the best of us. Aren't we all glad the Fly Lady is there to help?

MindyMom said...

You GO, girl!! I'm cheering for you. :)

Holy Hannah said...

I am right there with ya! I think even though we have known each other for almost 10 years we never really knew each other. Amazing how much you learn about someone through blogging! I am starting on the weight loss thing as well. I have well surpased my top preggo weight. I am rockin it witcha! I want to start running, I just have to do it. BBM me and we'll chat.

Nancy C said...

Every little step makes such a big difference. Rooting for you!

MommyK said...

I've been there before and it's rough. I only wish I had that time to go to the gym though. You can do it! Just stay positive and always the best of luck to you.

June said...

You can do this! I have complete faith in your ability to focus and meet your goals.

I still need to hop over to blogfrog but not till I have "earned" the extra blog time by planting some more flowers and cleaning the car.

Mike said...

Good luck with it. Our surrounding area is usually a reflection of what's going on inside. Once you get one or the other in better shape it will make the other one easier.

Unknown said...

Oh sister, I hear you. I've quit smoking twice in the past year and gained 15 pounds EACH time. I used to be the woman men turned to look at, and now I feel like the good year blimp!
I've been completely absorbed in your story, and I just think you're an absolutely amazing woman. You know, it's okay to hide under the blankets every once in awhile. Just make sure you don't go this alone. Create a support system of fabulous women who will surround you with love and support.
You're not alone :)

Danielle said...

I am so sorry that you are in this place. It is a good step to have a plan and it sounds like yours is solid. Remember how many of us are on your side. Good Luck!

leaving~the~girl~behind said...

If I've learned anything so far this year, it's the value of the phrases "One foot in front of the other" and "Chin up," particularly when things get tough! Consider me another reader rooting for you!!

Anonymous said...

Well, you've already inspired me! Im going to write down my old cleaning schedule and get back to it! Plus NO MORE blogging before exercising. I worked way to hard to lose those 45 pounds to risk gaining them back. You will do great!!

Dee at Pedestrian Palate said...

I know so many people that swear by the fly lady. That's a great place to start!

Already Happy said...

Thanks for the Fly Lady link! I think I am going to do it too.

I have signed up for spark people, but I never really use it.

Maybe I will try both tomorrow. Again, thanks fot the inspiration =)

Unknown said...

I know that funk, girl, I know it well. I am finally climbing out of it (slowly) and I can tell you exercise really helps me. It helps me burn off the stress, work through things in my head, and gets those natural endorphins flowing (feel-good hormones).

I agree with what Candice said---therapy can work wonders. So can drugs. I am doing both right now (prescription anti-depressants, not Coke/X, LOL!) and they are working wonders.

Don't be too hard on yourself or place your expectations too high. I think Baby Steps is the right idea.

We are here for you. You can do it. Be good to yourself---be BETTER to yourself. You deserve it.


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