Friday, December 3, 2010

Fed Up With Her

There is a lot of talk around the holiday season about our kids having too much. We go through their stuff and there are too many toys and too many video games. Their drawers are overflowing with clothes they never wear, infrequently worn shoes line the wall of their closet.

I am as guilty as the next parent when it comes to buying my kids everything they want. For my daughter it is brand name clothes and the world's supply of stuffed toys. For my son it is video games, movies, and books. Everyday their piles of stuff seem to grow and multiply like Gremlins. When is enough enough?

On Thursday morning, I reached my limit. After the fourth consecutive day of fighting with my daughter about her inability to find anything to wear and the treacherous condition of her bedroom, I snapped.

Tired of being screamed at. Tired of continuously being told "there is nothing to wear". Tired of tripping over blankets, garbage, toys, shoes, and dirty clothes. Tired of the stuff I've given her being uncared for and in constant disrepair.

This is what my daughter came home to:


Everything she owns that was strewn carelessly around her room is now in 1 of 8 garbage bags. The garbage is still where she left it and the clothes that don't meet her needs are still in the drawers. What happens from here is entirely up to her.

To reclaim her belongings, she must pick up the trash that still litters her room and vacuum. She must also go through her drawers and put the clothes she no longer wants into a bag to be donated. Then she can reclaim one bag at a time. Once she has gone through the contents of one bag and finds a place for each thing, she can reclaim the next bag.

She has until Sunday. Come bedtime on Sunday, what hasn't been reclaimed or put in it's place will be removed from her room - never to return again.

That means no more Justice jeans she left lying about, no more Osiris hightops, no more favorite blanket, no more J-14 magazines. I just hope that at some point, it sinks in. I'm at a loss for any other way to teach her how to take care of her things.

21 comments:

Casey said...

Ugh, we had to do the same thing with our 6 year old. It's very frustrating.

bigguysmama said...

You GO girl. I had to do something similar with my daughter at about the same age. ADD is not condusive to getting things done. Occasionally something like this needs to jar us. It might work this time, but not next time. Just keep at it mama! You'll get thru this!

♥ Mimi

Aunt Crazy said...

I just close my kids door...LOL but she doesn't whine about having nothing to wear or not being able to find anything. On the flip side, I will not buy her the bookshelves she's been begging for because she will not get her room in order to make a place for that shelf. I will not buy her stuff for her room, because she will not get her room ready to be decorated.

Sammy K said...

My parents did this to me a few times. I can honestly tell you that if you keep up with that, she'll get the point. No girl wants her things taken from her, I think you and I both know that. You GO mom!

Holy Hannah said...

This is just about the greatest idea I have ever seen. I am going to have to try this. You are one smart cookie!

punken said...

Thanks for a great idea our kids will not pick up their rooms! It will be interesting to see how this turns out.

Losing Brownies said...

My mom did the same thing with me. You know what? I didn't even miss the stuff that got donated, but I had no idea what was gone. That's how much stuff I had. I think it's a good lesson for her to learn. I know it was for me... and sometimes I want to pull that on my husband because he is a pack rat and a slob.

Renegades said...

I think it calls for accounability and with lack of it the consequence of losing stuff. Go for it!

singedwingangel said...

I took it one step further with my boys. I packed up everything except basic clothes, and their bed and blankets.
Every toy, game, etc was gone and put in the garage. I remained there until they could have respect for their rooms and things. Along with us. They whined and cried and cajoled trying to get it back. In that time Iwentthrough the stuff and donated about halfof it to Goodwill. When it came back they never even noticed what wasn't there anymore.

Babes Mami said...

I think that this is perfect solution and a fabulous idea. One that I will store away for imaginary future daughter use.

I hope she gets it!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Tough love, sounds like a great plan. Hope she is getting it!

Dee said...

I did this with my son when he was 4...the only I left in his room were his books. Two days later his room was spotless and he's kept it that way ever since then lol!

purseblogger said...

I so need to do this. It's a great idea and I'm sure it will work. Let me know.

The Drama Mama said...

I wish you good luck with this. I'd love to compare notes with you when you have time (I have a few tricks too).

Mike said...

Good for you.

gayle said...

Wish I had thought of this when my girls were living at home!

Anastasia said...

I think that is a fantastic idea! At least you gave her a chance to earn it back. I would have just tossed it.

Tracy said...

That is just so, so awesome.

Queenie Jeannie said...

Wow! What a great idea!!! I wish I would have thought of that for my oldest when she was still here! Sometimes you just have to draw a line in the sand.

It's funny now because she's on her own and is a neat freak. Mom isn't there to pick up stuff anymore!! And she turns out lights, etc now that she's paying the utilities bills.

Is it wrong that I laugh every time she says how expensive everything is???? LOL!

Danielle @ "We Don't Have It All Together" said...

Oh you're GOOD! I've done that before but with everything... and it didn't do any good because the girls didn't want the stuff back. So basically, I cleaned their room for them. Yeah, it bit me - they won.

Jenny said...

I think that's a great idea. Way to go! I hope it wakes her up a little and helps her realize some things need to change.

[HUGS]

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