Rethinking

Once upon a time I had something to say.

I was funny.

I was relevant.

I could form cohesive thoughts and put them into sentences.

Then I got distracted.

My boyfriend, my family, and people I know IRL started to read what I was writing.

I felt censored.

I felt judged.

I was lost.

So I started to rethink my purpose.

Why did I start to blog?

Did I have a goal?

Was there a message?

I read and re-read my about me.

I looked through all of my communities and my bios and I began to wonder.

Who is the woman I am putting out there?

Who is That One Mom?

And then I made a decision.

Hello, my friends. My name is Kristin. For the last year and a half you have known me as That One Mom. I am the only parent of two amazing and frustrating children. You have come to know them as The Boy and The Girl.

The Boy is Noah. He is 12 and in the 6th grade. I knew the day I found out he was coming into my life, I would never be the same. He is too smart for his own good and terrible at applying himself. He has a passion for literature and for gaming. How do the two mesh? I have no idea, but it makes him unique.

The Girl is Ahna. She is a 10 year-old firecracker with little use for what the world sees as conventional. She is a 5th grader, but is currently taking a break from traditional schooling for a more therapeutic learning environment. She puts countless smiles on my face and innumerable tears on my pillow. She loves animals and babies, and has a soft spot for the elderly. She is truly unlike any person I have ever met.

For the last 10 years, we have been a three-man team. We laugh together, play together, and are frequently on each others' last nerve. But I don't think any of us would want it any other way.

In September 2009, I began this blog as a means for reaching out to the rest of the world. I didn't have a particular goal. I just wanted to share. I wanted to interact. I wanted to hear and be heard.

When I began, I didn't know what SEO was. I knew nothing about tweeting, or social networking. I wasn't even sure what following was. I had no idea that people would actually subscribe to what I wrote and validate my thoughts and feelings with comments.

In the beginning, I was just a woman with a computer that had something to say.

Last week, I had a conversation with someone that resonated deep within me. He is a trainer that does fitness camps for kids. In our conversation he told me, "The best thing you can teach a kid is to build a foundation of themselves."

In rethinking my purpose as a blogger, I have learned that I need to stick to the foundation of myself. From this point forward, I will not allow myself to be censored. I will not do something because "it is the next logical step for my blog."

I will be Kristin.

Because for 33 years, that is what I have done best.