I'm losing my mind.
From being "F*#%ing fired!" to being told "Screw this!" each time she doesn't get her way, my daughter is completely out of control.
This morning we will be at a two hour intake for an intensive day treatment program that specializes in behavioral mangement. While the idea of the program makes me optimistic, there is still so much time before her start date. According to the intake director, the program usually lasts 6 - 9 months, sometimes as little as 3, depending on the patient's progress and participation. It is encouraging that the program is so intensive, but knowing my daughter, I am fully prepared for her to be there the full 9 months.
Nine months means that once she leaves her current elementary school, she won't be back. She will miss the end of her 5th grade year, with the kids she has known her whole life and the teachers she loves. Nine months also means that she will spend all day, 5 days a week, all summer long in treatment. Nine months means she will miss the first day of 6th grade and may not be able to attend the charter school where her brother is enrolled.
While I know that she needs this, it is difficult for me to accept.
As a parent, something inside of us breaks when our children are "damaged". I worry about her and the choices she makes. I wonder if she will be able to overcome these challenges. I fear that she may not have a "normal" future or the chance at a career.
I know she is only 10 and that she has a lot of years ahead of her. Sadly, our constant struggles make it difficult to see past the end of the day. I hope to have a lot of questions answered today. I hope to have many fears set at ease.