Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Intake

I'm losing my mind.

From being "F*#%ing fired!" to being told "Screw this!" each time she doesn't get her way, my daughter is completely out of control.

This morning we will be at a two hour intake for an intensive day treatment program that specializes in behavioral mangement. While the idea of the program makes me optimistic, there is still so much time before her start date. According to the intake director, the program usually lasts 6 - 9 months, sometimes as little as 3, depending on the patient's progress and participation. It is encouraging that the program is so intensive, but knowing my daughter, I am fully prepared for her to be there the full 9 months.

Nine months means that once she leaves her current elementary school, she won't be back. She will miss the end of her 5th grade year, with the kids she has known her whole life and the teachers she loves. Nine months also means that she will spend all day, 5 days a week, all summer long in treatment. Nine months means she will miss the first day of 6th grade and may not be able to attend the charter school where her brother is enrolled.

While I know that she needs this, it is difficult for me to accept.

As a parent, something inside of us breaks when our children are "damaged". I worry about her and the choices she makes. I wonder if she will be able to overcome these challenges. I fear that she may not have a "normal" future or the chance at a career.

I know she is only 10 and that she has a lot of years ahead of her. Sadly, our constant struggles make it difficult to see past the end of the day. I hope to have a lot of questions answered today. I hope to have many fears set at ease.

24 comments:

Danielle said...

I am keeping my fingers crossed for you and her! Hang in there, you are doing the right thing for her future!

Jules said...

Stay strong mommy....

Aunt Crazy said...

I hope this helps her!!!

June Freaking Cleaver said...

My son has been in day treatment programs before, but nothing that lengthy. I'm hoping that your daughter can find a reason to amp up her self-control - maybe their program will motivate her to keep her behavior in check a bit.

My son is 15, and we've been dealing with this since he was diagnosed with bipolar at six, and Asperger's at 9 - finally, in the school he started just last week, I see a glimmer of hope.

Never give up fighting for her. If any child needs love and support (even when you feel like throttling them or running away), it is our children with special needs.

Medication, therapy and a positive school environment can do the trick.

Good luck to both of you.

BigSis said...

Sending you lots of happy thought to help you through this. I know it can't be easy, but you are a great mom and a strong woman!

Rochelle@AFamilyofLooneys said...

Keep you guys in my prayers. Sometimes it is hard being a Mommy, but you are doing the right thing for you and your daughter.

Evonne said...

The choices we have to make for our children aren't always easy. I really hope that this program works for her.

Babes Mami said...

Hoping for the best!

Moo's Mamma said...

Sending Hugs strength to you....

April said...

Wishing you and your family the best. And thank you for sharing your struggle.

Mommy Lisa said...

Wow - that is so difficult. Hang in there!

Naila Moon of the Grey Wolf said...

I will put positive thoughts your way.
I wish you peace through this process and peace of mind for your daughter.
~Naila Moon

Katie Hurley, LCSW said...

I've worked in these programs in the past. You will have to be stronger than you can ever even imagine, but somehow you will find that strength.

When she comes out the other side a much happier chid, the current struggles will feel a distant memory.

Sending strength your way.

The Blue Zoo said...

Is the center local? So, she'll be home in the evenings right?

I hope everything goes smoothly.

Renegades said...

I wouldn't say she's damaged unless an outside force led her to the behaviors. Possibly just the right diagnosis, treatment, meds, doctors, or therapists just haven't been found yet.

Keep optomistic. You have to advocate for her she's to young to do it herself.

I know when I have depression episodes it's hard on my husband and folks but we've smartened up and look for an answer instead of just letting me go.

Hope things improve for you and you find your daughters answer.

bigguysmama said...

I know this isn't easy for you, but keep a look toward the future and the benefits for her life and then yours and your sons. I will be praying for you. You know my situation, and it's never easy. Sometimes it's truly all you can do.

~Mimi

Shaunells Hair said...

Good luck to you. Being a parent is never easy! I wish you all the best, and admire your committment.

gayle said...

Hoping everything goes well and your daughter gets the help she needs.

Queenie Jeannie said...

Big hugs! I hope this helps and you'll look back and know you did the right thing. We as parents do the best we can - it's all we have!

Also going through a trying parenting time, although not as severe as your challenges. It still hurts a Mom's heart.

Daffy said...

Sometimes its best to not look beyond the end of the day...life can be way overwhelming when we do that.

Thinking of you...

Shell said...

I hope that this helps her. Maybe it won't take as long as you think. Will be sending prayers.

Anastasia said...

Maybe she'll thrive and be done sooner. It can happen. Make sure they are keeping you updated with any incident reports, etc. Just so you know what's going on.

My fingers are crossed for you and her. Good luck.

M-Cat said...

A very difficult thing to be sure, but good on you for addressing issues early. Best wishes of luck and prayers for you and your daughter!

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