Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Finding Our Way


Today I am linking up with my friend Shell at Things I Can't Say.

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Wandering.

Aimlessly and unconsciously, my mind is always wandering.

Ideas spring into my head, and as quickly as they appear - they're gone.

There are many things I'd like to say. The thoughts just don't translate to words.

Constant questioning about my life and its happenings have me cautious about what I share.

If I breathe too deeply or exhale too long, my ex-boyfriend seems to know about it.

My daughter has been especially unsafe of late.

I worry about her aggression toward her brother. I worry about her aggression toward me.

I pray continuously that her illness stops tearing at the core of my family.

I pray that the damage done is not irreparable - for any of us.

As much as I long to, I cannot bury my head in the sand.

As much as it calls to me, I cannot spend my days hidden in the safety of my bed.

Some days I see glimmers. Other days I see giant rays. I know things are headed in the right direction.

I have hope. I have faith.

Finding the strength to fight through, finding the courage to share - these are my struggles.


I know that together and with God, we will find our way.



13 comments:

Kimberly said...

Hope moves mountains. Cling onto that with all you've got. You're doing a fantastic job and dont ever doubt that for a second

singedwingangel said...

OH mom sometimes it is overwhelming. Though I am not a single parent many times I feel like one since unless I am at wit's end hubby doesn't say a word. Having a bipolar child can definitely put a spin on things here as well... sending you lots of love and strength..

Di said...

Hang onto that hope!

I pray it gets better sooner and you can stop holding your breath!

Renegades said...

It sucks that you have to think of an ex-boyfriend knowing what you are up to when it's not any of his concern anymore.

I hope things for your daughter straighten out. Until then just keep doing what you are the best you can with the situation.

Keep hanging on!

adrienzgirl said...

Feathers to feathers, feathers to fins, we're here for you through thick and thin!

Never forget it! LOVE YOU!

Kelley said...

This was beautiful! I am so glad you see glimmers and rays!!

Cari said...

That was beautiful Kristin, I loved how you allowed yourself to be so vulnerable. Your in my prayers girl, God will see you through.

Sarah said...

Tough spot to be in!!! I hope things clear up so you can see the sun full time!!! Stopping by from PYHO :)

{Stephanie}The Drama Mama said...

Hope and faith will see you through. I worry about Jellybean's aggression towards her brother,too.

becca said...

hang onto the hope sweetie ..hugs


Everyday Life

Shell said...

Sending you prayers, my friend!

Chelle said...

Thinking of you, hun.

Also? Sending you hugs. LOTS of hugs because sometimes we just need a hug.

Prayers & love...

The Blue Zoo said...

You must have the most patience. You guys will make it! I know it.

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